I’m sure most of you have noticed that the posts just aren’t flying as freely as they used to. There’s been a lot of adjustment going on in my life. First moving in July, now welcoming our beautiful baby boy, Asher Lee. I hope to get back to my blogging routine soon, but for now allow me to share with you my thought process as a father in the first week….
FATHER…that’s me. It’s not my dad, it’s me. I’m a father. This seems matter-of-fact for most people; but for me, the tectonic plates of my life have shifted. My identity is different…my life is different. Different, not in a bad way, but in a “whoa!” or “wow” kinda way. I’m engulfed in this new, grand, and seemingly surreal life that I’m still having a hard time conceptualizing. Part of it is how my life has changed; how every decision needs to be calculated with the fact that we have a child. Can I go upstairs to brush my teeth? No, I need to wait until Amanda gets back downstairs from brushing her teeth so the baby isn’t left alone in the swing. No brushing together. Oh yeah, no sleep either; but I’ve already accepted that as life’s new norm so I forgot to even mention it. And never mind what I can’t do…how about what I must now do! Diapers. Mounds and mounds of diapers. My life is now about urine, poop, and spit-up breast milk.
This may seem like a big moan session, but I don’t mind the responsibility…in fact, I kinda like it. It’s an amazing feeling that this fragile human being is totally dependent upon my care. It’s heart-tingling to know that every kiss, hold, burp, smile, and wipe is an integral message of love to a baby who needs to know that the world is safe. More than that, this kid is totally worth it. I could go into a whole gushy diatribe why my kid is easily the cutest and best kid in the world, but that would be too cliche. Simply put, I love being a dad.
Who knows, maybe I’ll even buy a minivan.