Ever Wonder What to Say to Someone in Grief…Or What NOT to Say?

I studied German and make no mistake, it’s not the greatest language to sing.  Those gutturals just don’t have the flair of Italian or Brazilian Portuguese.  Christianese is another language that makes many cringe.  When you pack God, full of wonder and mystery, into a billboard slogan complete with rhyming words and all, something just doesn’t seem right.

We particularly like to open the can of cliches in the face of adversity.  Will it be ok?  Is God for me and not against me?

Truth is, an un-embellished dose of reality is more comforting than a lie in a tuxedo.  Will it be ok?  Well yes…there’s always heaven.  Is God for me?  Sure.  But we’re smart enough to know that OK is oftentimes not what we had in mind.  And if God were truly for us, He’d certainly not simply let us do whatever we wanted.  Sometimes the less comfortable route is the most blessed.  Character, integrity, and faith is nurtured in the pit of suffering and adversity.  So sometimes bad can be good, and good can be bad…and well, good can be just that and the same with bad.

My point is that in the moment of me venting my strife, you really don’t know what outcome is in store.  And neither do we…and that is what we grieve.  “I don’t know” is most honest response anyone can give.

What we need from you is regret, permission to be mad or sad, and a reinforcement of God’s presence and peace.  That sounds so much sweeter.


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